You have spent the weekend with your fiancé dreaming big – thinking through your ultimate “if we could have anything” wedding.

Now it’s time to think through one of the two key components which will help shape all future wedding planning decisions. First and foremost, your wedding guest list.

I highly recommend doing all lists electronically. My clients and I love google docs as this can be shared, edited and viewed in real-time. 

Below are my biggest tips and tricks for attacking your wedding guest list:

  1. Start big but realistic. With only your fiancé – Jot down your friends, colleagues and family who pop into your head immediately. Don’t stress about who they are friends of friends with or if their great cousin would be upset if they aren’t invited. Go with your gut as to who you think of first.
  2. Remember, this is YOUR Wedding –  Before you begin discussing guest lists with your families and friends (that’s next!) remind one another that this YOUR Wedding. Trust me, you will need to remind one another of this during various points of the planning process. This wedding is about you two and how you ultimately want to celebrate your marriage with friends and family. It is still incredibly important to acknowledge how important this day is to your Mom, brother and best friend. Just remember, in the end of the day, it is about you two. 
  3. Sit down with your parents and/or immediate family – And discuss who they would like present at your wedding and why it’s important to them. At this time you may or may not have begun to discuss budget. With that said, I encourage you to be open and honest with your families reassuring them that it’s important all immediate family and friends are present at the wedding however you are at the very beginning stages of planning. Budget and venue size will ultimately play a large role in determining the final guest list.
  4. Never delete someone off the list – But rather move them to another tab in your spread sheet. As not-nice as it sounds, you will eventually have a “B” list and sometimes even a “C”. 
  5. Set guidelines and stick to them – More on this for when you have finalized your budget, selected your venue and are getting ready to send those Save the Dates. However, you must together agree on determining criteria for your guest list. I always recommend asking yourself “would you be truly upset if they can’t make it?”. If your luke-warm about it – well, that may help determine if you are at 150 guests or 175.

Stuck and don’t know where to begin? Shoot me a note, my team and I would be happy to help with this important first step in planning!

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